Author, Wife, Busy Mom, A Woman after God's Heart.

Tag: amreflecting

The Randomness of Human Interaction

Do you ever get the feeling that you’re supposed to be at a certain place, but never know the reason why?

I can honestly say I’ve had many of those experiences. This latest random episode has mystified me a bit. Let me share…

A few months ago, my husband and I had an opportunity for a date night. There’s a local band that’s been around for many years. We’ve seen them at outdoor festivals and venues. This time, they were playing at a pub not too far from our house and my in-laws were happy to babysit.

The bar was crowded, as it wasn’t just us who knew about this band. We got a couple of drinks and slithered our way to a corner where the lights and sound control display was set up. Hugging the wall, we waited as the band came onto the stage. When the lights went dark, everyone went nuts. The flashing lights and loud drum beats made my heart nervous. Still, we were okay just in front of a short wall that separated the “standing room only” from the “reserved VIP” section.

Balancing my purse, I placed my drink on top of the ledge. A couple was seated at a table with bar stools with their backs to the erected wall.

The man looked over his shoulder and smiled, and I apologized for putting my drink behind him. He said it was okay, and we continued listening to the music.  After some time, the man turned again and started chatting with my husband. Next thing I knew, the man invited us to sit with them at their table.

Two steps up and the whole bar perspective changed. Higher than the standing room only patrons, it made a world of difference as I didn’t have to crane my neck to see the band.

The woman with the man introduced herself as his girlfriend. The man commented that he felt he should ask us to join them. We were grateful none-the-less, and my guy offered to buy them drinks.

Almost two and a half hours later, we were still there, enjoying this friendly couple’s gracious gesture, as well as sharing in some “grown-up” conversation about kids, life, friendship, and the band. Time had flown.

It was time for us to go. After countless thank yous and a friend request acceptance on Facebook, we got up to leave. The man was thankful for the time together. He hugged my husband and me. They were genuine hugs. Warm hugs from a down to earth kind of guy and his smiley girlfriend. It had been a good night. We bid goodbye and left.

Since March, I’ve seen several posts on the couple. Many pictures of happy faces and affectionate words to one another. I’ve even “Liked” a few posts.

A few weeks ago, I came across something that said that the man had died. I was shocked. I had just seen a picture of them together a few days before. Not a lot was disclosed on the cause of death, but it still felt like it wasn’t real. The man and woman had even gotten engaged recently.

Since his death and hundreds of photos posted later, I can see why there were so many pictures of him. His smile was contagious, his eyes friendly, and he was like a big bear with a happy demeanor.

My heart ached. I had only met this man and his girlfriend once and talked to them for a short time. By some strange higher intervention, something connected us together.

I can’t stop thinking of him. How did God take this man away so soon? He wasn’t old, maybe late 40s early 50s. How come we were chosen to sit with them that night at the bar? He lifted our spirits.

They had a service for him the other day. We didn’t go. I guess I’d feel funny going as if I’m invading their space. I sent our condolences online and I did the next best thing. I prayed. I prayed for his fiancé and family.

I’ve been around deaths of close loved ones, but not a random person. And because of this, I’ve been consumed with his passing. Every picture shows a joyous man who made everyone around him feel alive. I know my husband and I felt his presence.

Was it meant to meet these people? What can I learn from all this?

I guess the best answer is to really appreciate those random folks you meet along your road of life. You may never know someone really well, but I believe you can’t forget how they made you feel.

The Facebook Dare

doorslamonFacebooka

What do country artist, Tim McGraw, and Facebook have in common?

I admit I enjoy social media. For one, it’s addicting, and secondly, there are lots stories to scroll and read through. But, it’s what I like to call, “A time sucker”. Just when you think it will take ten minutes to read and browse, ends up turning into an hour of wasted time.

I remember the ‘good ol’ days’ when reading a local paper, or thumbing through the Time magazine sitting in the waiting area of the dentist office was the “your time consumer. You go into a doctor’s office now, and all the magazines and newspapers are untouched because everyone is on their phones.

Even more so, regarding Facebook, someone posts something on their wall and tons of comments follow. Some jokes, lots of personal opinions, and silly derogatory remarks. And frankly, I’ve gotten reeled in reading those commentaries.

The truth is, I’m tired of Facebook. It’s not because I’m on other social media like Instagram, Pinterest, Snapchat, or Twitter, but rather, I’ve been feeling out of touch lately. Something has been missing. Because while I have been busy “reading” the news feeds on Facebook, I have been missing the happenings of NOW.

It took me a while, but I realized I had to do something. I walked away from my Smartphone, PC, Tablet, and left Facebook. And then,

“I went skydiving,

I went Rocky Mountain climbing,

I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu…”

Okay, not exactly that. I exercised, which I normally do, but didn’t stop when my phone beeped with news feed updates. I finished reading a book in three days rather than three months, I danced, I napped, and I played with my girls.

I didn’t feel the tug of grabbing my phone to read what I have been missing because what I was missing was time spent with my family, and time for myself.

If I want news, I can just turn on the TV. It’s not the greatest source of information, but I could catch what’s happening in a few minutes, rather than being glued to a chair in front of a screen for hours. It’s also easier to hear the news while multi-tasking because I’ve become a pro at doing just that with small children around.

Most importantly, I didn’t feel the pressure of wanting to be connected all the time. I think and this is my personal opinion, this “connection-thing” that people fear they may lose if not following or commenting is just a fear for not associating with others on another level—i.e., face to face communication, or phone conversation. Remember that?

Humans aren’t wired to be connected all the time. We need downtime; we need quiet, and an opportunity to hear our thoughts.

STOP BEING PLUGGED IN and PLUG OUT every so often.

Because, then you can go…

“I went skydiving,

I went Rocky Mountain climbing,

I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fumanchu…”

Even, if it’s only in your mind.

So, take the Facebook challenge. Walk away and walk away without…Facebook, or any social media for a time.

Then, drop me note and let me know how that works out for you.

Connection is only as good as being in the moment of that connection.

Lyrics and Music Credit: Tim McGraw, “Live Like You Were Dying.”

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